Who you want to be needs to meet who you are. Not the you that is filtered. Not the you that spends more time on captions than on love letters. Not the you that scrolls more than speaks. Not the one who forgot how to smile unless it’s for a selfie. Not the you that appreciates the sun only when it gives good lighting. The you that just is. The you that will be without a for.
We’re all fascinated in creating a persona other than our own. Social media is the platform we use to put on our best show. The unfiltered, unedited and non existent inspirational quote exist outside the realms of the cyber home. We obsesse in creating the ideal life in order to believe our own is of substantial form. As we garnish up the perfect life we forget that the raw truth is what we remember when we’re looking back near the end of our time.
If you have an instagram or twitter you have probably encountered the word “goals” under a picture of a rich couple doing rich people things or under a rich person doing rich people things in general. Ladies, no a guy will not take you to paris spontaneously and then have a photoshoot with you that same night and upload a ridiculously cheesy but romantic caption. Be happy if he buys you Starbucks, times are tough life is expensive. Guys, no you probably will not drive a lambo all day with a girl in a bikini next to you and somehow someone will document it.Stop thinking a girl would want to walk around in a bikini all day because truth is we don’t and you probably won’t drive a lambo. These are all very unrealistic expectations of life. The thing about social media is that we have the ability to create a life apart from our own.We show what we want people to see not what is necessarily reality.
Stop writing “goals” because goals are things to strive for that will better you, striving for a relationship that takes HD pictures while they are eating perfectly assorted breakfast is not goals it is just stupid. I don’t understand how someone that takes time out of their day to make sure their food is aligned perfectly to the stars and make sure that the sun is hitting it the right angle could possibly be goals?
Many of these people feel they need validation from strangers and so they portray a lifestyle that is almost unattainable. Most people can’t take vacations every weekend and do all these crazy things because we have lives and responsibilities. I don’t see the point in comparing yourself to a picture yet that is what we do with social media. We look at something and think “goals, why not have real goals and instead of stalking someone else’s life appreciate your own.Trust, somewhere out there, there is a kid in a developing nation looking at your life and thinking bed goals, food goals.
Its 2015 people and if you don’t instagram what you’re doing chances are it didn’t happen. We tweet,do it for the gram and overall are consumed by social media. There are its pros and cons to it just like everything else in life. I decided to take a break from social media and the first few hours were surprisingly the hardest and as the day went on it became easier. I tend to check social media as soon as i wake up with all the eye boogers in my eyes I scroll. Today, however, I didn’t do that. I found myself having the urge to go scroll and to compensate I read random articles online and that was actually much more amusing than seeing a selfie of someone I don’t speak too. I did feel extremely disconnected but It was a good disconnected.My physical world was all I could see and the virtual world in which you could see peoples lives in glimpses of pictures and 140 characters was nothing but a myth.I can’t say it was life changing so far but definitely relaxing.
5o years ago when a boy asked for a girl’s number he intended on calling her and scheduling a date. Nowadays, asking for a girl’s number consists of txting her and not actually hearing her voice until you see her. Technology has given us new ways to meet,flirt, and show affection. For example, to be sweet you post someone as your MCM (man crush monday) or WCW (women crush wednesday).There is nothing wrong with showing someone off to their “followers” however, it is effortless and this effortless affection has internalized itself in today’s dating world. What you post can be detrimental, what you like will be questioned and who you follow can end in conflict.
The flaws of the internet can result in you being on a date with a girl who you feel you may get along with well, suddenly, she’s comfortable enough and she keeps checking to see if she has any likes or retweets. Then she’ll go on complaining about all the creeps online and you will just sit there and all of a sudden realize you just met another girl dying for attention, probably emitting from lack of love or other “daddy issues.”
You might feel like you met a great guy then you notice that he still has his ex girlfriend on social media, he assures you it’s no big deal but bear in mind that he will be looking at her most likely weekly or daily. Her “liking” something relevant to you may just be a nice coy to allude you from the fact that there is still something there.
Your end result? you see failed attempts to healthy functioning relationships and you’re left with bitter single people saying that men are all pigs and hoes ain’t loyal. Social media has become a part of our culture and our identity. What we post is how people will view us and that in itself makes it all the more important. In regards to dating in this “like” culture, my only advice is don’t look for a soulmate on tinder or self worth on Instagram or your ability to be witty and humorous on twitter. My advice is simple, put it down and actually live in the moment. Don’t be consumed by a virtual reality instead ponder,dream, and listen.Stop saying all men are the same and stop insinuating that all women want attention. Stop browsing and start living.